Real Life and The Feels

Hey Friends!

So, yesterday on facebook, I posted a small paragraph of my new book "Chub Rub" that drops on November 17, 2016.

Add to your TBR ~~~> Goodreads- http://bit.ly/2dkGwqj

This paragraph is so deeply personal to me, and I wanted to share it with you now.

"I made fun of myself so other people didn’t have to. I put myself down because the sting of my words was less brutal than the sting of theirs. It was easier to have people laugh with me than to have those same people laughing at me. In the end though, it didn’t matter how much I tried to love myself, when someone made fun of me, I lost a little of that love. I didn’t want the crass words of ignorant people to affect me the way that it did, but I was human, and most times, I couldn’t help it."

As a little girl I was bullied pretty heavily for my weight (no pun intended). I wasn't the popular girl. In fact, I was a band geek, and a drama nerd. It was merciless and I went home crying more often then not. This went on from the first grade until I graduated High School.

Even today, I find myself crying into my pillow in bed at night. It's stupid. I'm 30 and I let the words of strangers affect me so much. But as Maggie above said, I'm human, and I can't help it. There are times I let it glide right over me, and pay it no mind, but sometimes it cuts deep.

No one knows this, but I came up with the idea for this book on one of those sleepless nights. A day I had been driving down the road, windows down, singing to the music and a group of young kids drove up next to me and decided it would be fun to scream out the window "Hey you fat lump of shit, why don't you just die" It hurt me..... pretty badly.

It wasn't the first time and it certainly won't be the last.

Writing this book released a lot of my emotions into the pages and really helped. I still have my down days but I feel stronger with Jackson's words circling in my mind. (Jackson is the main character).

This book is LITERALLY my world. I eat, breathe, and sleep Chub Rub, and I am saddened that my journey with writing it has come to end. I hope, that you have the opportunity to read it. It's emotional, and vulnerable, and SEXY AS HELL, but it's my best work to date.

Thank you all for your continued support. I love you all!